Skip to main content

Insane Sanity

Insane Sanity
15 February 2018
This insane sanity that has taken over my mind,
Is something, I wish everyone could find.
It's the idea that in life, I can actually be free,
From doubt, shame, fear and misery.
For years I created many false stories,
Written in my own mind's laboratories.
Somehow I knew love couldn't be mine,
And pushing everyone away, was totally fine.
I told myself I would forever be,
Victim, burden, slave for eternity.
I told myself there was no way out,
Adhearing to negativity and doubt.
I always had hope, one day things would change.
Yet I continuing firing down that same lonely range.
I now know that was the true insanity,
Continuing on that path of righteous vanity.
My ego said I was better than everyone,
Because I was the only person who wanted to run.
When I finally let go, and let someone else drive,
My vessel stopped taking so many nosedives.
This is the thought that has taken over my life,
And cut through all the lies, like a burning knife.
The secret to escape from where I was caged,
Was learning my movements, were on myself gaged.
It took me a while to figure this out,
And I'm constantly learning to fight the bout.
When my brain starts to take control,
I ask God to shut it off, free my heart and soul.
In my mind there remains a daily fight,
I must ask Him again to let His will take flight.
I know if I depend on the One up above,
And those He put in my live, teaching me love,
My story may never actually shift,
Yet the clouds surrounding it will surely lift.
I'm a different story teller than I was in days past,
And by reaching out, my insane sanity will always last.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Frozen

W hy am I so scared to heal? Is it laziness? Is it fear? What am I scared of? Why don't I want to thrive, only survive? I have issues with isolation, laziness, distractions. How do I get out of this loop? I'm frozen, stalled. Procrastination and avoidance are my daily routines. Frozen 24 April 2022 Marie Slider Scared to heal, scared to live, Why is there no care that I give? Desire to run or walk away, But can't take a step to get out of my way. I'm frozen in a bubble of time, Completely surrounded by dust and grime. Cobwebs entangle my conscious mind, Body entangled by ropes that bind. Apathy threatens to take control, Darkening my beautiful soul. My light inside, it flickers and fades, Isolation cuts like sharpened blades. Fear of failure and fear of success, My brain and heart are completely a mess. Can't see a way out most of the days, My mind's labyrinth firmly betrays. Self-awareness, a strength to many who seek, For a person like m

My Squad of Angels

My Squad of Angels 29 December 2017 They're not that far away; all those who passed before. They're waiting for my arrival just behind this mortal door. They're watching and guiding prayerfully in that space that's just beyond. They're in the creases of my heart; a place they're very fond. They're floating through my memories, to help sort out my past. They want me to find happiness, but their flag is at half mast. They do this to help me bear the weight of struggles along the way.  They want to give their strength to me during every painful day. They wait beyond my consciousness, their warmth they want to share; Sometimes I feel it blowing in the wind that moves my hair. I see them in a stranger's face as a flicker or a feeling. Sometimes the similarities scare me through the ceiling. I wonder if that person may be sent from one who passed, Or if a chance connection is a hook my loved ones

Traveling Again

  Traveling Again 11 May 2022 Marie Slider I'm on that rough path again, though this time I see the lies, T hat Satan often tells me, but God, he hears my cries. Those rocks and sticks I've overcome, I thought would break my bones, Have only made me stronger, many times I have been shown. I'm not that same lost girl, who was stuck in the dark, The warmth of that calm spirit, resides within my heart. The darkness tries to overcome, but this journey has let me see, That I've walked this path before, and God can set me free. I have to push myself again, to walk this path of sorrow, And I know that, yet again, I may walk it tomorrow. Today, however, I can find that door that's so inviting, And be embraced by Heavenly Father, (isn't that exciting?) He will always give me peace, if I reach out my hand And I know that one day, I will permanently take that stand. But, if I have to turn around, and take another journey, Through the hurt and anger, th